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Overcome your obstacles with these 4 essential steps

People don’t know how to face their obstacles. For most people, the best strategy includes denial and it’s followed by depression.

Obstacles are an important part of anyone’s life and if you learn how to deal with them, you’ll actually learn how to enjoy life. After all, being able to overcome an obstacle means being able to succeed in a small area of your life.

We all want to be successful.

But how are you going to be (or even more important, feel) successful if:

  • you can’t have the job you want?
  • you can’t find someone to love?
  • you can’t make friends spend your free time with?

We want so many things in this life and some may say that’s the problem. But wanting many things is not necessarily a problem.

Instead, it becomes a problem when we want many things but we get to have few or none of them. That’s where the frustrations appear. After that, if you don’t know how to overcome your obstacles, the more you’ll try to force things, the more powerful the frustration may become and you can end up with a nasty depression.

  • Become conscious of what’s holding you back
  • Understand the roots of your obstacles
  • Set the smallest daily step you can do to improve
  • Meditate to understand your obstacles and the process you’re going through

Step 1: Become conscious of what’s holding you back

This first step is really tricky.

Let’s say you are the type of person who has lots of ideas and wants to do so many things. But one year passes and you realize you haven’t done any of them.

Therefore, what’s the problem?

Are you lazy? Are you having problems organizing your tasks? Are you struggling to find the right partners to help you build your ideas?

At first, these reasons may seem reasonable. But what if they are not really the thing that’s holding you back? What if they are not the obstacles you’re looking for?

I used to work with someone who was in a situation like this and we reached the conclusion that as long as he’s constantly investing his time in solving others’ problems, he won’t have any time left for himself.

You see, he is the type of person who loves helping others and that desire to always help others made him not have any time for himself, his ideas, and his dreams.

Most of the time, it’s really hard to identify what’s holding you back and it’s recommended to ask for help. If you have a friend who’s good at listening, ask for their help. If your friends can’t help, ask for a specialist’s help (coach, therapist, etc.). It’s easier than trying to figure the obstacles that are holding you back. And it’s going to save you a lot of time.

Step 2: Understand the roots of your obstacles

Right after you’ve identified what’s holding you back, it’s really important to understand why the thing that’s holding you back is part of your life.

Understanding why means:

  • knowing the reasons for why you are still doing that;
  • identifying the habits behind it;
  • identifying the triggers of the habits.

Knowing the reasons is important because, in most cases, the reason for doing something is usually fueling your obstacles with a specific amount of energy. And that energy is what gives you the strength of doing it.

Identifying the habits is important because, in most cases, we end up doing things that we are not really aware of and it’s happening because we created small habits and routines around that situation.

And finally, identifying the triggers is important because a habit is always activated by something. A trigger can be a thought, a feeling, or even another habit.

Fun Fact: 0 % More Productive

Did you know that optimists are 12% more productive in the workplace?

Step 3: Set the smallest daily step you can do to improve

What’s the simplest thing you could do, every day from now on, to improve the situation you’re in, without negatively impacting those around you?

That simple thing should be related to the situation you want to change, the obstacles you want to overcome, the habits behind the obstacles, and the triggers that are activating the habits.

This third step comes with a lot of trial and error. In most cases, identifying the habit is hard. And it’s even harder to identify the trigger of the habit.

That’s why I always recommend people to be patient and don’t punish themselves if they fail in overcoming their struggles. It’s not easy and it takes a lot of time and effort.

The smallest daily thing you could do shouldn’t take you more than 5 minutes. If you manage to do something every day for 5 minutes and your life is gradually improving, then you’re on the right path.

Step 4: Meditate to understand your obstacles and the process you’re going through

This is somehow related to the 3rd step.

While you’re trying to discover the smallest daily thing you could do, it’s really important to analyze your evolution. You can do that through meditation.

And since meditation is different for everyone, make sure you take notes. Just buy a notebook and write down something related to your situation after each session of meditation.

Taking notes is really important because you’ll be able to look back at your efforts and realize how much you’ve changed.

With love and optimism,
David

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