Life, by its nature, is pain, suffering, and struggle. There’s always going to be some sort of setback between you and where you want to go. It can be something short-term and, when that happens, we see it as a challenge. But the longer it lasts, the more we’re inclined to see it as struggle and suffering.
For me, the past two years have been very painful because I expected that, by solving whatever I was going through, that solution would have provided peace. But in that exact solution, I was finding my next problem.
I was very close to having no money. I even used my savings and reached a point where I only had money for a few months of food and bills. It was very difficult. And whenever I was thinking that I would get out of that situation, I was bumping into a new setback and was struggling and suffering again.
And we have this impression that, as we get through life and move outside our situation, the struggle ends. That’s why people believe that money will solve their problems. But you can be a millionaire and struggle more than you currently do.
If that’s the case, why even live?
Because life is not about struggle. Life is about enjoying whatever you have through your struggle.
The worst thing is that, most times, we’re not struggling to do just one thing. We’re struggling with 2-3 things at the same time, of various importance. And they carry a lot of weight.
Besides my financial situation, I was struggling with addiction. I’m addicted to sugar (anything sweet – it can be chocolate, cake, chips, biscuits, etc. and also drinks such as Coca-Cola) and video games.
Even though in the past month and a half I made decent progress, it feels like I made no progress. The itch and the cravings are there and, the longer I go without sugar or video games, the more difficult it becomes. But not all days are hard.
And I know what the problem is. The problem is not the food itself or the need for entertainment. The problem is emotional and it goes very deep. I even know what I have to do to solve it (because I’ve been avoiding it for a very long time) but solving it doesn’t depend just on me. I’ve learned that whatever emotional problems we have, solving them requires a partner.
And here’s the real paradox: as soon as I solve this problem, I’ll bump right into the next one.
But as I said, life is not about struggle but about enjoying whatever you have through your struggle.
When you see struggle as part of the process
I strongly believe that being alive means being a student. You learn as long as you live and, when you stop learning, you slowly fade away. Your health declines and your mind loses its sharpness.
To struggle can mean a few different things, but they all speak about the same thing:
- It means to exert muscular energy against a material force or mass.
- It means to be engaged with a problem or task.
- It means to have a difficulty in doing something.
- It means to progress with difficulty.
All these definitions point to a process in which you learn something.
Learning, problem, and solution are tied together and life cannot happen outside of them. Through struggle, we live our lives.
When you see things like that, next time you struggle you won’t panic. Instead, you will trust the process because to struggle means to live your life.
With love and optimism,
David
Photo by alex Roosso on Unsplash