The fear of the unknown is one of the common fears that people experience in their day-by-day life. But this fear, which seems to be the antagonist of our lives, has a simple antidote: curiosity.
I remember that in 2022, when I did my first Camino de Santiago, I met on the road two guys from Amsterdam (they were both 22-23 years old). I was on my 3rd day on the road (started from Porto). They were on their 3rd month on the road (started from Faro) and were carrying some huge backpacks, with everything was needed for their trip: from clothes, to a frying pan and cylinder, and a tent.
The day I met them, I was very tired and was trying to get some rest, even though I had only walked for 13 kilometers that day.
I had just entered the Albergue, checked in, and went to the room to change my clothes. And I sat in to rest my body. 30 minutes later, the two guys enter the room, with the huge backpacks I told you previously, and change the energy of the room. We started talking and they told me that they were about to grab something to eat. Since I just had eaten, I joined them for a beer.
In this story, I didn’t know anyone and no one. But I kept my curiosity alive towards meeting the two guys and befriending them.
I could have just said ‘hello’ and refused their invitation simply because I didn’t know them and for whatever negative thing could have happened. That would have been the manifestation of the fear of the unknown. Instead, I decided to do exactly the opposite, and I’m glad I did.
In the 11 days I spent on my first Camino de Santiago, from Porto to Santiago de Compostela, I kept meeting the same guys over and over again for another 5 or 6 days. And every time I had something new to learn or a story to share.
At the opposite pole of the fear of the unknown
At the opposite pole of the fear of the unknown, you’ll find exactly the things you need, at this moment of your life.
When you don’t let the unknown dictate your life and control your road ahead, you discover life. You discover people, new experiences, and new information that contribute to who you are, as a human being.
Last week, I joined an offline event where people from different local NGOs met to know each other and exchange ideas. I’m not a member of any local NGO, so I went there as a specialist, with the intention of better understanding what is going on in the city.
At the end of the day, I left with good energy, with new people I had met, and with a new direction that, one way or another, I kept ignoring, even though I wanted it in my life. That event and the way I interacted with others at that event helped me become aware of a part of myself I had forgotten.
And maybe it sounds simple…
But it sounds simple because it’s simple.
The fear of the unknown is a feeling that comes alive because we’ve wrongly educated ourselves regarding the stories we tell ourselves about what happens to us (and what doesn’t happen to us).
Because the unknown you have in your mind is nothing more than just a story. A story you haven’t discovered anything about yet. A story that you tell yourself, so you don’t want to discover whatever there is to be discovered.
Change the story you tell yourself about the things you don’t know
We live in a time where we easily tell ourselves negative stories.
It’s so simple to create, in your mind, a negative thought because of two reasons:
- Negative thoughts keep you where you already are, in your comfort zone, without you having to make any effort to change something
- It’s easier for negative thoughts to contribute to the identity of your ego
But because something is easy, it doesn’t mean you should continue doing it.
Become aware of the simplicity of your negative thoughts, stay alert when they arise, and be careful not to fall into the trap of believing in those thoughts. They are just thoughts, and without your energy and involvement, they will remain simple thoughts – they won’t dictate your life.
When you do that, you give yourself the chance to rewrite the story you live and discover new things that will complete you, as a human being.
Just because you know nothing about something, it doesn’t mean it’s bad.
With love and optimism,
David