To help you understand how your advice for others reflect the needs you have, I’ll start with this idea: we are all energy and we all come from the same source. Before we are born and arrive in our mothers’ bodies, we come from the same source of energy.
At this moment, if you touch two fingers, you don’t feel the fingers themselves, but that’s what your mind is telling you. What you feel is energy, but your mind perceives it as two sticks, covered in flesh and skin, that are touching each other.
Considering we are all energy and we come from the same source of energy, it makes me think we only interact with ourselves.
Here’s an example.
I have a friend whom I know very well. A while ago, I was with him and a few more people, having dinner at a restaurant. After we leave the place, my friend tells me something about one of the other people from our table. He tells me that he didn’t like how this person spoke, like their mouth was always full and you couldn’t hear a thing they’re saying.
But when I was looking at my friend, I was seeing the same things – the same difficulties in speaking that he noticed in the person from our table.
What I’m trying to say is that whenever someone is giving you advice, that person also communicates with a part of themselves. And it makes it valuable for them as well.
Pay close attention to your advice because they’re useful
Whenever you give someone your advice or you recommend someone to do something, you speak with a part of you that you see in that person.
If you pay close attention to this, I promise you’ll discover many things about yourself and your growth. You’ll be able to take that advice and use them to change things about yourself, and that change will be valuable.
I started doing this probably around 5 years ago and since then, I pay attention to the advice I give others and the advice others give, both to me and others.
While I understand it may not make too much sense, next time you feel like you want to give advice, stop for a second and understand how that advice could suit you. It may surprise you.
The reason your advice is not useful to others
Maybe it happened to you before to recommend something to a friend and they ignored what you recommended.
The reason it happened is the same.
Your advice for others is just a reflection of your own needs.
When I look at the advice others gave me, I rarely resonate with something. When someone gives me advice, they look at me through the image they have of me. They don’t see me the way I am, but rather how they think I am. And because of this, the advice I get is connected to who they think I am, not to who I am.
The perception you have of me is connected to who you are as a human being, your experiences, your past, your culture, and so on. All these things are about you, not about the person in front of you (the one whom you’re giving advice).
This is a reason why I believe that you should take into consideration that advice and put it into practice.
With love and optimism,
David
